Saturday, May 29, 2010

The Evil Grin

It makes your heart sink.
Can feel his presence whenever you laugh too much.
Just have to look behind and there it is 'the evil grin'.
The one that's there to make you doubt yourself.
Doubt Others.
Doubt Everything.
You tell yourself its all in the head and you won't be affected.
But you already are.
You can see the domino effect and you just wait n watch.
Tell yourself that next time you'll be stronger and won't let your dreams fall like a pack of cards.
Makes you feel better for a while, sometimes.
But you'd rarely forget that he's always behind you, watching every move, with that evil grin.
Guess that's what god looks like.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Let Go

Remember battling it out in the swimming pool to stay afloat ? Well I do. How the basic instinct told me to come out of the water and put my feet on the ground, To not trust the well proven Archimedes principle.

How something you badly want like a college or a prize and failure takes away all your confidence and you had already lost your life preparing for the same.

How that special someone turned your life upside down 'in a bad way' but still the apparent 'problem' is hardly ever acknowledged.

Someplace you want to get away from, someplace you want to be and putting everything into it for the same. Well its no different then struggling to stay afloat without even letting go.

What does feel good is to let go, when suddenly you're no longer drowning. It does feel good when there's no longer any pressure from within to have an ultimate goal. Suddenly so many possibilities start to appear out of nowhere and some are even good ;)

Even letting go a person brings a lot of 'possibilities' into the picture.

May be being open to things here than imagining better things on the other side all the time is not such a bad idea. May be all the problems are not as real as we make ourselves believe they are. We just need our 'pleasant' surprises to keep us happy and surprises need us to be open to receiving them :)

I Wonder

Something made me wonder. Why is it that people are almost always disappointed. If you fail then you're supposed to be disappointed and if you succeed then its just one step forward which was 'expected', hard earned, not a surprise.
New people excite us whereas old jokes become annoying (this is until we realize 'old is gold' :P ).
I wonder is it because whenever we're looking for happiness from a particular direction, we inadvertently close all the doors leading it to us? Or an alternate view which kind of questions the meaning of happiness. Is 'surprise factor' the real catch ? Do we need that surprise, that 'pleasant' shock to feel happy ? That might explain why we like to do something outrageous every once in a while ? Or is it just me ?

May be we just want to see if we can still surprise ourselves. May be that's all happiness is. It's HOPE that there's more to world and life then what we have witnessed so far and its nicer and worth living for.

Monday, May 24, 2010

The Original Bicycle Diaries

Long time ago I ventured into the unknown. The land far far away. Despite all the warnings, the arguments and after a lot of thinking I finally decided to go and face the world down under... Well lets cut the crap. I went to Chennai for my summer internship at IIT Madras during my college days. The campus was huge and hence I got myself a bicycle(read bike). Well I did know 'one' soul in the city, a friend from college who was interning close by at IIMSC which was about 2 Kms away from the IIT hostel gate. So here is what happened...

One fine day he was nice enough to call me to go out with him and his friends. He knew I was pretty much alone so won't even give it a second thought. The movie was 'ok' but the people's reaction to Rajinikanth's 'Shivaji' was a lot of fun. Beach after that was nice too and then we got back to his dorm. Now it was past 1 AM and I couldn't see anyone on the streets well that's how it is over there. I expressed some concern about getting back in one piece and his friends offered me to stay back in the dorm but he 'suggested' I should head to IIT. His last words were "Don't worry man."

The anger and annoyance made me 'kick-start' my bike and there I left for a life altering experience. I decided to take the 2 Km shortcut which was like the narrows as there was no way that I'd ride for 8 Kms to reach my room. As soon as I entered the haunted road a couple of dogs started barking at me. I told myself that the protocol dictates that I should stay calm, So I did but I thought the smarter thing would be to act calm but paddle faster. They kept chasing me nonetheless. Then there was another left cut. As soon as I turned I realized they've got some reinforcements. Five or six dogs after my life on a dark narrow road. Now there was no time for games. I was riding a fast as I could and asking myself why the hell did I buy a second hand one as paying 5 times more for a new one is definitely worth it if it saves my life right? Then I started cursing Menaka Gandhi, Changi(The Friend) and swore to take their lives if I could save mine.

Then, right then it struck me, I watched this program on discovery channel where this scientist goes to a jungle with the objective of scaring away a tiger. He stretched his arms and roared and It Worked. The idea is if you can prove to the animal that you're stronger than him then they'll leave. So I tried to do the same but the roar somehow came out like a scream(i guess) and the dogs became wilder. Now I thought there's no way I'm reaching IIT but somehow managed to gather enough courage to 'roar' again and guess what they came to an immediate halt. I hailed in triumph telling myself "who's the man!". I finally looked forward as the dogs had stopped chasing me and I realized I'm on the extreme right of the narrow road and there was an SUV right in front of me. Well it was parked but I was traveling at the speed of light. It was too late to apply brakes. The only thought that came to my mind was
Man I can't believe my luck.
I crashed with half of me on the bonnet.

I got back on my feet I was feeling no pain so I assumed I'm not that badly hurt. The dogs seemed confused too, now staring from some distance. I tried to pick up my bike and start moving again but something was not right. The front bar connecting the front wheel to the body of the bike had turned 90 degrees. So there I was stuck in the middle of nowhere. I decided to do something before the dogs run out of patience so I jumped into the house i had crashed in front of. I tried calling Changi but he didn't answer to save the incoming charges while roaming. Now I started remembering how I noticed that every house on this road seemed to have a pet. Finally I heard a voice, an auto driver who lived next door and was woken up due the noise, took me back to IIT with my bike and refused to take money. True Story.

P.S. For a funnier version of the same story please checkout

Saturday, May 22, 2010

My Mumbai Checklist

Unlike Abhirup and Vibhor's list, Mine is not centered around south bbay. Well of course not, I've always lived in the suburbs right :P And now so do you guys :D

1. Hard Rock Café, Lower Parel [Starting with home but in no particular order after this]
2. Coffee Shop at Taj President
3. Mondegar, Colaba
4. Leopold, Colaba
5. Koyla, Colaba
6. Cafe Basilico, Colaba
7. Theobroma, Colaba
8. Bade Miyan, Colaba
9. Tavern, Fariyaz, Colaba
10. Pizzeria, Marine Drive
11. Not Just Jazz by the Bay, Marine Drive
12. Mocha, Marine Drive
13. Hotel Marine Plaza, Marine Drive
14. Valhalla, Churchgate
15. Khyber, Fort
16. Crepe Station, Oshiwara
17. Ayub’s, Fort
18. Soul Fry Casa, Fort
19. Peshawar, Fort
20. 5 spices, Fort
21. Bachelor’s, Chowpatty
22. Café Noorani, Tardeo
23. Kyani & Co
24. Copper Chimney, Phoenix
25. Spaghetti Kitchen, Hiranandani
26. Zenzi, Bandra
27. Mocha Mojo, Bandra
28. Open Affair, Bandra
29. Papa Pancho, Bandra
30. Elbo Room, Bandra
31. Karim’s , Hiranandani
32. Masalacraft Kitchen and Bar, Bandra
33. Salt water café, Bandra
34. Chilis, Hiranandani
35. Toto’s Garage, Bandra
36. Mainland China, Hiranandani
37. Sheesha Sky Lounge, Andheri
38. Firangi Paani, Andheri
39. Aura, Hiranandani
40. Mocha, Hiranandani
41. Hangla, Hiranandani
42. Aromas, Hiranandani
43. Yoko Sizzlers, Hiranandani
44. Sammy Sosa, Oshiwara
45. Sankalp, Hiranandani
46. Mantra, hiranandani,
47. Pop Tate’s, Powai
48. Happy Singh, Sakinaka
49. Bond, Mulund
50. Rajdhani, Mulund
51. Timbaktoo, Mulund
52. Pop Tate's, Ghatkopar
53. Parathas, Hiranandani
54. Red Box Cafe, Andheri
55. Punjab Restaurant, Bhandup
56. Bistro Grill, Mulund
57. Bistro grill, Hiranandani
58. Ghostana, hiranandani
59. Calcutta Club, Oshiwara
60. Gajalee, Seepz
61. Sanjraj, Bhandup
62. Ghostana, Bandra
63. Bar-Be-Que Nation, Bandra
64. BTC, Vashi
65. Garcia’s Pizza, Andheri
66. Enigma, Juhu
67. Poison, Bandra
68. Irani Café, Matunga
69. Status Veg Restaurant, Nariman Point
70. Only Parathas, Mulund
71. China House
72. Rude Lounge, Powai
73. Mini Punjab, Powai
74. Sports bar, Phoenix
75. La Brasserie, La Meridien
76. Uno Bar & Grills, Ramada, Powai
77. Herb n Spice, Ramada, Powai
78. Dhua, Andheri
79. A few Baristas, Pizza Huts, Shiv Sagars, Subways’ CCDs, Gloria Jeans, MODs, Dominos , McD’s and south Indian restaurants.
80. Firangi Pani, Bandra
81. Saffron Spice, Hiranandani
82. Clove Bar, Hiranandani
83. Great Punjab, Hiranandani
84. Kasbah, Hiranandani
85. Pop Tate's, Vikhroli
86. WTF, Khar (W)
87. Oven Fresh, Dadar
88. Renaissance, Powai
89. ITC Maratha, Andheri
90. Bling, Leela Hotel
91. Ling's Pavilion
92. Mocha, Juhu
93. Alfredo's Vile Parle (W)
94. Mumbai Times Café, Bandra
95. Hawaiian Shack, Bandra
96. Caravan Serai, Bandra
97. Rain Forest, R-City
98. Nando's, Goregaon
99. Theobroma, Bandra
100. Aer, Four Seasons Hotel, Worli
101. Cafe Basillico, Bandra
102. Gostana, pali hill, bandra,
103. Velvet, Renessaince, Powai
104. Coffee Shop, Renessaince
105. Shiro, Lower Parel
106. Just Round the Corner, Bandra
107. Mainland China, haji Ali
108. Moshe's, Colaba

Wish List:
1. Blue Frog
2. Indigo
3. Busaba
4. Zaffran, Fort

Monday, May 17, 2010

School Days

At some sub-conscious level I feel that I'm just waiting for this rather adventurous summer vacations to get over before I go back to school again. Play cricket again. Get to say 'no' to work again. Not be accountable again.

I still remember the early days when I always used to look at the main gate during the lunch break just counting minutes before I'd be 'free'. Then school started becoming more and more enjoyable, not that I stopped faking illness to steal a leave. Summer Holidays were still eagerly awaited and the last week of the holidays was usually accompanied by a severe chest pain owing to the tremendous back log due to untouched holiday homework. But somehow it always worked out.

Then came the senior years and school became more important than home. There was no way we could miss out on anything what-so-ever. The career counseling began and it was time to 'make our dreams come true'. Well I don't know how that is turning out for most of us but the journey is always more important and the companions make it memorable. The battle continues and there's still hope to return to 'school' of some sorts.

The work goes on, the cause endures, the hope still lives and the dreams shall never die.
- Edward Kennedy

Monday, May 10, 2010

People I don't get at all:

1. Who don't like Chocolate.
2. Who question the awesomeness of Beer.
3. Who don't worship Sachin Tendulkar.
4. Who haven't watched Dark Knight Yet.
5. Who Diet.
6. Who mix upper and lower case letters in a word tHInKinG its cool.
7. Who dance in Hard Rock Cafe.
8. Who talk slowly (kills me from inside).
9. Who don't munch at night.
10. Who follow a strict schedule.
11. Who come for dinner but aren't hungry because they had a glass of MILK before they left from home.
12. Who don't love HOUSE and SHELDON.
13. Who aren't in LOVE with Bombay.

Well this can go on for a while...

Wednesday, May 5, 2010


"We are not here because we're free, we're here because we are not free. There is no escaping reason, no denying purpose, because as we both know, without purpose, we would not exist." - Agent Smith

I* can't remember the last time I was really captivated by 'something^' or 'someone#' (Actually I kinda do remember but don't really want to bring it up here). I think I'm missing the feeling of thinking nothing 'else'. To have your mind fixated at a particular 'thing' or a particular 'one'. When everything else didn't bother me so much. When I didn't question myself so much. When happiness wasn't so costly (and didn't even require taking a cab to Worli). I'm digressing again.

When there was still hope for a 'perfect' something/someone/life. When the 'examination' papers were designed to be cracked. When cynicism hadn't crossed all boundaries. When time wasn't running out (at least from the looks of it). When getting up in the morning(/afternoon) was easier, there was a reason to smile while preparing for the day ahead, there was Purpose.

* I'm writing in first person as I'm not sure how lost others really are as they kinda do seem to have some sort of a plan.
^ Any goal, gadget, plan, accomplishment etc.
# Too obvious man!